Sshshsshs...pass it over please!

It happened yesterday evening only. Vasu, Darsh, mom, dad and I were fortunate candidates for 'darshans' at the neighborhood mandirji (Jain temple). Vasu was as usual in no mood to pray or even pretend. Darsh following the suit was all naughty and restless. As soon as I left him on the floor, he ran his way to the baskets of holy tiny utensils of Mandirji. Tiny spoons, miniature bowls and small plates – all unfailingly attracted him beyond control. Compelled, I was carrying Darsh in my lap as Mom prepared ‘aarti’. As soon as mom lighted the oil lamp, Vasu started making hush sounds to hint that the oil lamp must be given to him for performing aarti. By consensus only an agreeable activity for him, he was given the oil lamp, which he moved clockwise and pendulum-like almost to his fill. Then it was forced taken away by me to be given to mom. Vasu started hushing all over again, stretching out his right hand towards mom, his fingers working in coordination to indicate that he wanted the lantern back.

Inspired, Darsh broke the silence with his own hush sounds, his hand also stretched out, his fingers moving in and out of the fist, as if virtually saying, "Sshshsshshh...pass it over to me instead please!"

Mom and I simply could not control a brief mirth in between the ‘aarti’ recital.

CAN YOU WILL ...

It was one of the Saturdays of October’ 2006. I was sitting across the table to the principal of ‘Blessings'. I was attending a PTM and she was gratifying me with her valuable feedback on Vasu. Vasu joined Blessings in February the same year. The domineering principal of 'a truly English-medium playschool' told me with a distinct hint of frustration, " Your son is an absolute Hindi speaking kid!" She distorted her face to drag her lower jaw even lower and swelled out her lower lip to act out one of Vasu’s innocent remarks to her," Ped pe chidiya baithi hai m'am!" Her face sprung back to its normal contour as she added, “He just does not speak in English. Well... at least he understands all of us as we speak to him. You should speak to him in English at home." Months have passed by ever since. Today, Vasu is at least seven months elder. He understands and speaks English reasonably well. His sentences have grammatical errors, but he has grasped the basic fundamental of sentence formation - something I learnt only when I was well versed with how to read and write. He amuses me when I call him up from office and he makes it a point to reply me back in the foreign language on preferential basis. He makes very to the point conversations over the phone. I guess he does not like talking to the instrument, even if a voice is audible from the other side and even if it is recognizable as belonging to an acquaintance. Rarely does he hold a conversation with me over the phone... I do not know whether I unintentionally exerted pressure, or was it the play school, but whenever he needs to speak to me about something or tell me about something consciously, he uses English. Nowadays he frequently asks English translations of Hindi words that he cannot translate himself. In the middle of telling me something, he would ask, “Mama! ‘ladne’ ko English main kya kehtein hain?” As I reply, “Fight.” He would instantly continue, “Mama! I don’t fight with my brother.” He would ask me to rebuke Darsh when he opines his conduct objectionable. He would command me courteously,” Mama! Please tell Darsh, don’t hit me!” When I oblige him instantly in a rather feeble tone by his expectations, he commands, “Mama! Say faster!” I correct him, “Do you mean louder?” He answers back, “Yes! Say loudly to Darsh!” I oblige with finesse this time to suit his criterion and am let off with approval. Then he reiterates the censure in a louder tone of voice, and thus exercises and proves that is he (Vasu) is elder to him(Darsh). Nowadays, his languages, both English and Hindi, are facing their worst days. Be it in terms of fluency or making sense, neither language helps him express himself adroitly. May be he is experimenting with the languages too much. Or may be he has unlearnt all mugged up lessons.. His pet dialogue nowadays is, “ Can you will …?" - "Can you will give me water?”, “Can you will push my swing?”, “Can you will give me a pen?” I would correct, “Vasu either use will or can. They are not used together.”, as if he will learn thus. Now I have started correcting him by telling the right way to say it. “Vasu say, could you please push my swing?” It is a tried and tested formula with Vasu… I gather he has learnt most of his present understanding of English by listening to such corrections or norms of speaking from me, and of course his teachers and even Harry Potter/ Polar Express/ Finding Nemo/ Ice Age I movies to some extent. Now, it does not matter whether and when would he refine his grip on the languages. All that always mattered to me was overcoming the initial hitch that impedes most of us in progressing with a new language, specifically English. Once that is overcome and the child finds the language no big issue, the job is done according to me! Love you Vasu! May one day you overwhelm me by surpassing my parameters of superlative excellence and make me too proud to handle! May true knowledge, true conduct and true ideal find home in your heart and mind very very very soon! Amen!

A heartthrob he is…

“Chayyyyo! Chayau! “, says Darsh, my 18 months old younger son, as he holds my hand tightly and pushes me towards him with full force. Thus he asks me to get up and accompany him. His perseverance leaves me with no other choice but to give in to his demand lest he may hurt himself but never give up. Though it is too soon to comment on his nature and attitude, he seems to me an adventurous and go-getter soul. He speaks hints of words used in day-to-day life in a cuckoo sound and understands whatever we say to him without a fault. He does all teeny-tiny jobs - putting utensils in the kitchen sink, fetching a certain item from the other room, switching on/ off light/ fan - with sincerity and promptness. He believes in blind faith I guess. He would frequently jump off the table or bed without a forethought, leaving little time for the person standing nearby to react and take charge of the situation.

He calls Bhanu “Aanu”, Paani “Aani”, Naani “Aani”, Naanu “Aanu” and Khana “Kaana”. In the evening, when I am greeted with a cheerfull loud sound of 'Muummmmmy!!!!' from Vasu, Darsh repeats after Vasu - 'MMaannni!!!'. The 'Manni' sound unfailingly replaces the smile on my face with a heart-felt laughter. I response back with a cuddle and "I love you, Darsh!" He coos back “I aU”. When I say “Jai Jinendra” to him and ask him to wish me back, he mostly says “Jai Jinendra” back with his hand folded like they should be. When I ask him to pray, he sings haywire hints of Namokar Mantra. I can distinctly hear “Om”, “Namo”, “Nam”. When he wants something, he says "Chaiye-Chaiye". Whenever he gets hurt, he approaches with a seeking face with one of his hand on the hurt body part and says in an equally concerned voice, “Kya ua…Kya ua... “. When he does something wrong, he says in a tone as if complaining about someone else's wrong doing - “Kya kiya...Kya kiya..”. And of course, he calls TV "TE" and does not like his cartoon channel to be changed. Otherwise, he complains to me consistently pointing at the TV, "Mama! TE!.. Mama! TE!" He seemingly uses a thorough thought before socializing with anybody elder and not family. But he never misses an opportunity of saying hello or initiating a conversation with a kid of his age. He is a darling in the house. He imitates Vasu and Vasu gets his share of inspirations from him. On the lines of Vasu's fascination with changing clothes frequently, Darsh also chooses a shirt or a knicker for him from the almirah and asks us to put it on him. He loves being cuddled and fondled. He already shows distinct signs of comprehension and interest in the world around him. Unlike Vasu at his age, he has been expressing himself quite clearly and showering us with a lot of attention and interest. I particularly feel bowled over when I call him loudly in the house, and he comes from one extreme corner of the house, making this sound - "Hunh??? Kya???", in a very matter of fact manner, like I respond when my name is called. And when I tell him to please bring me my purse from the other room, he ventures out on the mission without wasting anytime, seemingly in an eagerness to serve me. Indeed, he makes my days and nights happier! My heartthrob! May Samyaktva dawn on him on asap basis! Amen! Jai Jinendra!

Smile and Say...!!!

Vasu tried his hands at speaking after a long haul of observation as if. Only when he was experienced enough to be called 18 months old, he showed any eagerness to emulate tones and rythmes he heard.

I guess Bhanu's perserving insistence to entertain him with the two poems - "Upar pankha chalta hai, neeche baby sota hai..." and "Haathi raja bahut bhale, Sund utha ke kahan chale..." - eventually changed his heart. Enthused by Bhanu's performance, he finally imitated her actions! Though, it took him little more time to try to sing the poem with Bhanu, the wait was worth it.

Of course, the words he uttered were remotely identifiable as something similar to the languages known to us, but the sound of them would melt sugar into my ears, unfailingly. His first ever signals that he could get what I spoke and even follow me!, rendered me truly ecstatic.

Vasu not only made use of my patience, but even taught me how to inculcate it in better quantity. Only when he turned two, he started showing a richer vocabulary. He would now utter two to three word sentences. Like one afternoon during the lunch hour, he expressed himself like..."Patha de do, patha de do mijhe...". I must mention, his tone was particularly rustic!

To be very honest, I have been quite satisfied with the pace of his developments, even if it included taking his own time in doing things. After all, it gave me more time with a younger and growing Vasu!

Though he could not speak well for quite some time, he started showing keen fondness for movies, cartoons and poem videos. In fact, he is a regular viewer of cartoon programs on TV since he was one. He has watched many animated movies again and again, lost in their world, gaping at the TV/ computer screen for continuous hours.

Vasu is a faithful fan of Harry Potter. He learnt this name when he was barely two. Just imagine, when he could hardly hold a conversation in English language on his own, he memorized two short stories from the Harry Potter series in English! He still finds it an irresistible time pass to listen to Harry Potter stories from Bhanu and stare at the cover pages of the Harry Potter books to tell the story on the basis.

Today, Vasu gives me lessons in good manners and corrects me upon my loud and angry tone. Basically giving me the taste of my own medicine, he would frequently object on being spoken to him in an authoritative and upset fashion and interrupt saying, "Pehle hans ke bolo, pyar se bolo... ". When I was taking my seat on the computer chair today and simply asked Vasu to make room, he said, "Fist smile and say, Vasu please get a side. First say Vasu and then say please, get a side". Some days ago, we were expecting guests and I had just returned from office. I was very hungry and really needed to munch something. A packetful of wafers in front of me were very tempting but I had to contain myself. Just like that I said to myself, " Agar maine ye kha liya to guests kya mera muh dekhenge!".

Big deal? Bleakest idea I had that Vasu could be even noticing. Days later, he reportedly restrained from having wafers in the afternoon and said the exact same phrase to Bhanu! I better watch my language from now on!

Odd but not so strange...

It happens with everybody, people meet and leave a mark on our psyche. One such person who seems to have left an unfading mark on Vasu's memory is his self-assumed friend - Amrita didi!
She lived with us for barely two months, in fact much less than two months, from January mid to February 2007. She was also our first experience with a full-time housemaid. Attractive, young and innocent as she was, we were all thankful that she did not make it to the wrong hands through the vicious network of arranging 24 hour maid from poor families residing in the remote villages and towns of India.
Back to the context, while she was kept by my younger sister whilst her stay with us post-delivery, Amrita ended up being a caretaker to Vasu and Darsh all the while. She would basically help me out in getting things done for Vasu and Darsh. Initially, Vasu did not open up with her as usual.
As time passed, I would find Vasu playing with Amrita, as I would send her off to the block's park overlooking our house, with Vasu and Darsh - something I could not manage otherwise as a matter of routine. I would always find Amrita more inclined towards Darsh, may be being younger and cuter. But through out, I never realised that Vasu was inculcating emotional bonding for Amrita. May be because he often ordered her like a house-maid should be, and we used to object and insist on some respect as she was elder.
The night Vaibhav left for his own home, I was quite taken aback. Three years six months plus back then, Vasu tended to stay aloof of people around him. He never insisted on somebody particular's presence around him. He was mast in his own world all the time. But the night Vaibhav left with my younger sister, her husband and of course Amrita, Vasu was all tears... crying for NOT Vaibhav.. definitely not his mausi or mausa ji (aunty and uncle) but for his new found friend Amrita Didi.. He cried bitterly.. "Amrita didi mat jaao. Amrita didi ke paaas jaana hai... nahi...Amrita didi ke paas jaana hai.. Amrita didi mat jaao... "
I had to literally contain him with force, and later explain to him that Amrita didi is supposed to take care of Vaibhav. He understood..
As time passed, we hoped that Vasu's fondness with Amrita didi will pass away.
Earlier Vasu would demand to talk to Amrita didi, which would in turn trigger on unfailing whispers between us. He sort of sensed that his interest in Amrita didi does not fetch him favorable impression from us. So, gradually he subsided uttering her name.. now he would look forward to visits of Vaibhav, Mausa ji and Mausi ( you must have got his point by now!) His logical mind drew a clear cut conclusion... Mausi (aunty) and Vaibhav meant Amrita didi for company!
Yet we hoped that it was a temporary phenomenon.
One day Vasu literally exhibited how much he was missing Vaibhav, his elder Mausi and Mausa ji. He waited for them to appear for no good reason. All through the evening ... he kept talking about them.. not a word about Amrita... not a single utterance of her name...
But the entire evening of restlessness to meet Vaibhav and mausi, mausa ji had a hint of hope of meeting Amrita Didi too...
Yesterday, 11/05/2007, Bhanu posed as Amrita over phone and talked to Vasu at length.. and I could find a happier and more obedient Vasu the entire evening... !!! I know the joy had to do with the beginning of his summer holidays too... but the role of Amrita in bringing a heartly smile on his face cannot be discounted.
Lets see, how long does his memory retain the impressions of his first friend-cum-didi... [:)]

Infants cast mysterious magic spells...

Living with the central characters of my life's script, delight and awareness have become synonymous to my days and nights. None other time pass appeals more than spending time with kids - be it friends or movies or shopping - and office actually seems enemy-like. In fact, I have been taking many offs from work recently, and quite helplessly too. As if the prospect of doing the jobs of two children with my own hands and watching them grow for a longer time was not enough, the force recently TRIPLED. Yes tripled! Vasu, Darsh and now "Vaibhav". Vaibhav, born on 3rd of December'2006 at 11:46 AM - is the youngest and the most charming kiddo at home - my cute little nephew. The urge is but naturally overpowering. Yet to turn two months old, the angellic looks invariably makes amazingly steady eye contact for minutes together. He listens (discerningly as if) and almost consistently quips ideal responses through his heart-robbing facial expressions and coo-coo voices. When his delicate thin rosy lips curl to form a smile, his sugar sweet coo-coo voice adding tasteful music to the ambiance, he seems as if actually rejoicing your joys and jokes [:-D]. He recognizes his mom rather distinctly and becomes more vivacious at her sight and touch. Truly turning out to be an expert at stealing hearts, he brings wider smiles and louder chirps wherever he is present. [:-)] Loads of best wishes and long life for him! God bless him! AMEN!

General but very subjective...

Talking with a fellow parent invariably renews my own zest and commitment as a parent. The utter enthusiasm and the distinct twinkle in their eyes is infectious. I gather the feelings in parenthood are pervasive and quite general. Let me recount some cute accounts I heard recently... One of the colleagues of my younger sister at Navisite has a one year old son - same as Darsh's age. He fondly talks about him and tells that wherever his son accompanies, he renders the standards higher. Wondering what it implies??? Well..well... wherever his son goes, people have to put everything higher so as to keep them out of his reach! [:-D] I absolutely identify. Infact, any parent of a toddler will identify with his experience. [:-)] One of my colleagues, Mita, has an adorable three year old daughter - four months younger to Vasu. The locus of her mom's energy, Laasya is a consistent and frequent topic of our gossiping sessions. And aren't they absolutely enjoyable. The girl almost habitually leaves Mita at the end of her lucid wits. [:-D] Like, one evening Mita reiterated to her that she sees everything Laasya does and does not, even when she is not around her... Laasya instantaneously quipped, "Are you Durga Thakur???" [:-D] Another day, Laasya was being very naughty at the nearby temple... running about in the premises, giggling and chirping non-stop. So her mom had to ask Laasya to make use of some peace, sit down and pray. Guess what, not only did she oblige, but started praying thus with her hands folded and eyes tight shut - General, yet not quite... " Bhagwaan ji, mujhe thodi shanti de do, aur thodi toffees de do. Mummy ko bolo ki woh mujhe thodi icecream bhi dila dein aur mujhe ghumaane le jaayein. Mujhe bade school mein daal do..." ... her wish list was going on and on as her mom watched her with astonishment and eventually prompted her to say thank you as well to Bhagwan ji. [:-D] Speaking about prayers, let me also share here the first time when Vasu pleased me in a similar fashion. It was early January or late December. One night I requested Vasu to chant prayer loudly on my behest. Not only he obliged, but also chanted Namokar mantra thrice and carried on with the names of Tirthankar Chaubisi, just like I had been praying before him loudly, whenever I got chances. Man! Wasn't it delightful? I felt so gratified. He exemplified, he not only listened to me carefully but also was sensitive to my preference to the count of three. The day I also realised for the first time that he was memorising the names of the 24 Tirthankaras, I rhythmically chanted before him a counted few times. [:)] Now, with time, he has become more fluent with the names and Namokar Mantra. His pronunciation is much better and fluency more consistent. Yet none of it can overlap the joy of the first time, but obviously.